


Let Me Hold You, Love

by Toxic_Ships



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Self Harm, self hate
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-03
Updated: 2018-08-03
Packaged: 2019-06-21 10:48:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15556050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Toxic_Ships/pseuds/Toxic_Ships
Summary: Ayyyyy Get ready for an emotional rollercoaster





	Let Me Hold You, Love

**Author's Note:**

> Ayyyyy Get ready for an emotional rollercoaster

    I sighed softly as I forced myself to leave the library, desperately I tried to open the large glass doors, (with a stack of books that you need two hands to hold, opening a door is nearly impossible) much to my dismay the door was also a pull, not a push.

  After about a minute of struggling, a figure made itself seen in the glass, and the door opened. Great, Malfoy, just what I needed.

“Hey Potter.” He laughed, I couldn’t help but roll my eyes, really? I mean why would Malfoy bother me during my free time?

  “Malfoy.” I responded, whipping around to give the blonde a death glare, what could he want from me?

  “Okay, for one, you’re welcome for opening the door, watching you struggle was hilarious and pathetic, and two, I was supposed to be dared to ask you on a date, neither of us want that so just, say no, very loudly.” Malfoy mumbled, his eyes flicking to the floor as a blush creeped up his cheeks. His face was bright red within thirty seconds of me just staring.

  “Sure.” I shrugged, making sure my voice was as loud as possible. Okay, it’s not like I liked Draco, er-Malfoy, but I mean, if he wanted me to say something I should say the exact opposite, because of how much I don’t like him.

  “You-What?” He screeched, turning to face a group of other people, snickering and/or wide eyes and shocked. All of them were laughing or just staring, except for Hermione and Luna, who were shooting knowing glances at each other.

  “Honestly, how did they not know?” Hermione snickered, and Luna just nodded in agreement. Though Ron was just standing with his jaw nearly hitting the floor, eyes wide and confused.

  “I told you to say no…” Malfoy hissed, his voice lowering itself to be drowned out by the giggles and whispers that shot through the hall. I couldn’t help but smirk at the blush that he was so clearly trying to suppress.

  “You should know by now that I don’t listen, Malfoy.” I laughed, “Pick me up at six, no later than that, your whole fashionably late thing is ridiculous.”

  I stood up, and walked down the hall, shooting glances at Draco who was uncomfortably standing and itching his arms through his jacket, his face blushing more as the group of people walked up to him, laughing and mocking as he stood there, I couldn’t help but feel bad, or I didn’t feel bad, I was just glad I got out of there!

  I raced out of the door of the school, I loved staying after hours, the library was one of my favorite places! The only problem was all the people having afternoon classes while I was in the library, that was kind of annoying. But it was a nice environment, and it was peaceful, it was nice to have some peace every once and a while, after the battle at Hogwarts everyone thought it was best to finish school in the muggle world, all of us moved into an apartment building, all of us who were scarred by the battle, all of us who weren’t staying at Hogwarts, all of us who weren’t dead. We were all changed, we tried to pretend everything was okay, we pretended it was all normal, we pretended it was unchanged.

  We went to some local high school for our last year, we pretended to have moved from different places, we pretended to be normal. We made few friends, we instead chose to stick to the friends we already had, the friends that we’ve attached ourselves to, the friends that didn’t die.

  It was strange, all the new things in the muggle world. The technology, the people, the food, we didn’t know how to navigate our way around a completely new world. We were like aliens. I seemed to be one of the few people who understood some, Ron knew a bit because of his father, Hermione had always been interested in muggle history, being a half blood.

  But I spent so much of my life here, well most of the life I spent here was in a closet, but that’s beside the point.

  I checked my watch that sat comfortably on my wrist, 5:53, and I told him pick me up at 6:00, shit. I rushed to my apartment, feet padding against side walk. I just looked like another man in a rush to get home, I just looked like another high school student running home. Nobody cared about my back story as I ran, nobody stopped in the middle of the road to guess what I had been through. No one would guess I fought in a war, no one would guess that I could use magic. No one would guess I lost friends and family, I just looked like another kid who would go home to a family, another kid who had a family.

  I listened to the sound, the wind in the trees and the sound of talking, the sound of voices, the sound of heels against the concrete, the sound of flats against concrete. I found comfort in the sound of the city, noises were one thing that never changed. The voices of my friends were unchanging, no matter if they were happy or sad, they always had a bite in their voices that never changed.

  I smiled, staring up at the five story apartment complex. The building was white, with many windows, all of which were outlined in black. Most of the rooms on the very top (where I lived) had balconies, decked out in furniture and plants, vines grew along some of the railings.

  With another quick glance at the complex, I ran up to the brown wooden chair, and ran in.

  “Hello.” I nodded, greeting the man who was typing on the public computers. He smiled and nodded at me, a strange way to say hello in my opinion (Malfoy did it all the time.)

  I raced up the stairs, the elevator was currently broken. 5:55, such a strange time. My breath quickened as I ran, my legs burned and my breathing shortened.

  Flight two, flight three, flight four.

  One more set of stairs, a little bit longer before I could go on a date with Draco, I mean Malfoy. A little bit longer before I could make awkward conversation and ignore my desires to run my fingers through his stupidly perfect hair. Just a little bit longer.

  Flight five.

  My breath hitched and I nearly collapsed at the top of the staircase, my knees turning to jelly as I walked along the flat carpet, searching for my room number.

  E4, kind of like ‘before’ but E4, Floor five and room four. I let out a shaky breath as I took me key out of my pocket, quickly unlocking the door.

  “Shit…” I mumbled, pacing around the room, how was I supposed to get ready?

  Shower. I should shower. I quickly undressed and hopped in the shower, grimacing as the cold water made the hair on my neck stand. I didn’t have time to wait for the water to warm up. I sighed softly, rubbing some shampoo (it may have been soap, I’m not sure) through my hair, and staring at the conditioner that I rarely used. I was not doing this for Malfoy or anything, my hair was just really messy! I ran the conditioner through my hair, I shot a quick glance at the soap bar sitting on the side of the shower, yeah that was going to take up way too much time, time I didn’t have!

  I quickly hopped back out of the shower, wrapping a towel around my waist and running to check the time 6:04, he was late again, not surprising. I sighed, but at least I had a couple more minutes. I paced around the room, looking for something to wear, but I ended up just wearing a red button up and blue jeans (with a black dress jacket because that’s what Draco wore to his date with some girl at school one time.)

  I then decided to sit on my bed and stare at my ceiling, waiting impatiently. Around maybe a quarter til seven I decided to turn on the TV, maybe the news would drown out my sorrows by showing me other people had it worse, because at this point, I knew Draco wasn’t coming.

  Then when the clock struck seven, the doorbell rang.


End file.
